ICM - Leeds Design Agency

My memories of being nine are a little hazy – apparently it was 1983 and there were lots of new things in the world, Microsoft Word for one, the single source of the massive spike in stress since computers were invented. Lots of things happened, and I can’t say that I paid attention to ANY of them, changes in the big world were on the telly, they washed over me like so much airborne sherbet dip.

I remember wearing school uniforms that were the wrong shape for me, I was shaped like a comedy carrot and the uniforms were meant for . . . well . . . smallish humans. My hair was all over the place (and yes – I had hair back then), I gained a secondary nickname of The Fleece. I was good to mediocre at most things, hung around with a mix of kids and generally did not quite fit in any category. My form teacher for that year even told my parents this at a Parents evening that I was a bit of a conundrum, they just could not letterbox me.

And then nine became a good year for me – I found out I could run like a whippet, and when I went up against the fastest kid in the school (who happened to be the HARDEST kid in the school as well) and won, something happened. I got something that had eluded me for a considerable amount of my youth. Confidence.

I also found that I could draw, and what was more surprising – I enjoyed it. This gave me MORE confidence, and it all started rolling from there. The rest is history. I am now as messed up due to overconfidence. I have tattoos all over, only three fingers that bend, a surprisingly life-like left leg and an internal Sony Minidisk player where my fourth rib should be . . .

Oh yeah – as much as it guts me to say it, mum was right, you CAN eat too much chocolate and be sick. Do it anyway . . . Its all part of being Nine.